I posted parts of this essay on my Dad last year, but I am going to expand and add more of my husband. He's not fond of it when I include him in online posts, but such a good man needs some celebrating too!
My memories of my Dad come stuck together with Gorilla Glue and duct tape. Those two things were the first line of defense in his tool box. My father could fix anything and he proved it many times, especially with my mom. He could have her laughing in an instant. Unfortunately, he could not save her in the end, but he never left her side during her decline. My Dad fixed my hurts, my broken hearts, my broken cars and my furniture in need of repair. He also taught me that kindness goes a long way and to also treat people with respect, as we do not walk in their shoes. He proved this many times over, going beyond the pale to help people he knew and he didn't know. And he always did this without expecting payment or even a thank you.
My father was a extraordinary storyteller as was my father's father. He and Grandpa had us mesmerized during family events as we gathered around a churning freezer of homemade ice cream and listened to those two tell us stories of their youth and life. My Dad was one of five children and it sounds like they had a raucous time together growing up. Sadly only 2 of my father's sisters are left with us. It is so hard to bury those we love, but this is a celebration, Their lives have touched us and the memories of their love will live in all of us who came in contact with them.
I could always count on my Dad to be there when I needed him. He encouraged me to go to college and luckily I listened. He helped me become the first one on my side of the family to graduate from college. He was a huge cheerleader in my life and I miss him every single day and I wish we had been lucky enough to have more time with him.
I have heard that you marry your father and in my case that is true. I married my best friend, my biggest supporter and the right man for me. One thing that will never change is his large supply of integrity and honesty. He will never let you down and he is the first one I turn to for help when I need it. Of course, he is always close to me, as we work together in our small business. We have been doing that for 14 years now. I could not imagine doing it without him and even though we end up being together almost 24/7, we are still married. Ha! Ha!
My husband is a wonderful father. He always wishes the best for our daughter. He feels her hurts deeply and wants badly to prevent them, while knowing that is not always possible. He will always be there for her and lead by example with respect. I know our daughter is lucky to have him and even though they don't always agree, they know the other one loves them and only wants the best for them. To love and be loved is such a precious value in this world. He always loves us and strives to do the best for his family and those he loves.
My Father (and my mother) welcomed my husband into the family right away. They were good people who chose to see the best in people and knew I had been lucky enough to find one of the best. When our daughter was born, my parents were right there the next day helping out. One Christmas, we gave our daughter, Ashley, a PowerWheels Barbie Corvette. My dad and husband put it together on Christmas Eve. It took a little while, and when they were finished there were some parts left over. You see, my dad never read the instructions, he just studied the parts and assembled them as best he could. My husband tends to do the same thing. Of course, I sometimes read the instructions for him. That car lasted through our daughter's childhood and we finally gave it away when she turned seven and we were moving to Orlando. It's probably still running somewhere.
When God created kindness in this world, he had to be thinking of my Dad. He was the epitome of kindness and love. He would do anything for the three of us kids, Mom, or anyone else who crossed his path. I was so lucky and blessed to have him as a Father and to have two loving, wonderful parents. God broke the mold when he made my Dad. We talked almost every day after we lost Mom, and he was my connection to that side of my family. I miss those wonderful days of family rollerbat games and homemade ice cream, but mostly I just miss my Dad. But I am one of the lucky ones - I had him for a father. He taught me many things but most of all he taught me to love. They say you end of marrying someone like your father, Lucky for me, my daughter has a Dad that is just a wonderful! I hope she finds one like my Dad and her father. Thanks, Dad......
My memories of my Dad always come together with Gorilla Glue and taped up with duct tape. Those items were the first line of defense in his tool box. My father could fix anything and he proved it many times. He was very good at fixing whatever ailed my mom. Unfortunately, he could not save her in the end, but he never left her side.
My father was a extraordinary storyteller as was my father's father. He and grandpa were at many family events with all of us gathered around a churning freezer of homemade ice cream to listen to those two tell us stories of their youth and life. My Dad was one of five children and it sounds like they had a raucous time together growing up. My father loved to talk about his youthful days growing up around Mebane and Hillsborough. His group of friends, like many young men even to this day, loved fast cars. They would meet up on a night here or there and take turns racing to the one-lane bridge near their home. Dad would shift while one of his friends would drive the car and push the clutch. It's amazing to think none of them were ever hurt. This started many a young man on his quest to become a Nascar driver.
When my Father met my Mother, they would double-date with my aunt and her future husband, my uncle now. My parents eventually married but they were scared to tell their parents about it since both sets wanted them to wait until they were older and had saved
more money. They were both helping to support the family home. My mom's father farmed tobacco out in Person County and my Dad's father worked on cars and at a trucking company as a mechanic. Both sets of families worked hard to make ends meet but
enjoyed time together. They would go home after seeing each other to their respective parent's homes for weeks after they were actually married. Eventually when they saved up enough money to start their own home, they told each set of parents. That is respect.
I could always count on my Dad to be there when I needed him. He encouraged me to go to college and luckily I listened and went on to become the first one on my side of the family to graduate from college. He went with me to all the financial aid meetings and helped me find a way to afford it. He has a huge cheerleader for me. Don't get me wrong, I worked hard to put myself through college by working 30 - 40 hours a week at Food Lion, but my mom and dad were always there if they could help in any way. Unfortunately today, most kids can't work their way through college, it's just too darned expensive.
My father was your best friend and whenever you needed anything you know you could ask him and he would help you. He never asked for anything in return and usually he never asked for help. He did get some help putting on the addition to our house when I was a teenager but he did so much of it by himself. When our daughter was born, my parents were right there the next day helping out. One Christmas, we gave our daughter, Ashley, a PowerWheels Barbie Corvette. My dad and husband put it together on Christmas Eve. It took a little while, and when they were finished there were some parts left over. You see, my dad never read the instructions, he just studied the parts and assembled them as best he could. That car lasted through our daughter's childhood and we finally gave it away when she turned seven and we were moving to Orlando. It is probably somewhere still running somewhere.
When creating the word kindness, God had to be thinking of my Dad. He was the epitome of kindness and love. He would do anything for the three of us kids, Mom, or anyone else who crossed his path. I was so lucky and blessed to have him as a Father and to have two loving, wonderful parents. God broke the mold when they made my Dad. We talked all most every day after we lost Mom, and he was my connection to that side of my family. I miss those wonderful days of family softball games and homemade ice cream, but mostly I just miss my Dad. But I am one of the luck ones - I had him for a Father. He taught me many things but most of all he taught me to love. They say you end of marrying someone like your father, Lucky for me, my daughter has a Dad that is just a wonderful! I hope she
finds one like my Dad and her father to be the father of her children. Thanks, Dad......
Diane Chamberlain's novel, Pretending to Dance, follows adult Molly as she deals with the loss of her child and the fact that she and her husband, Aidan, will never be able to physically have any children of their own. But Molly's life is not what it seems, she has secrets from Aidan. Secrets that she has carried around in her head and heart her whole life. As Molly and Aidan go through the adoption process to find a child of their own, her heart and mind force her to think back and deal with her childhood in North Carolina.
Molly was born as the illegitimate child of her father, Graham, and Amalia, a coworker at a mental hospital where he worked prior to marrying Nora. During her early years, Amalia brought Molly to Morrison Ridge and gave her to Molly's father and his wife, Nora to raise.
Amalia ends up staying in the private community and being a part of Molly's life. Molly's father is now suffering from a severe case of muscular disease that is advancing quickly. What happens during the summer in which Molly turned fourteen will effect her forever. She is determined to find the answers that she has been running from for years. She left North Carolina and has not spoken to her mother, Nora, since or even her birth mother, Amalia.
Pretending to Dance explores the family relationship between mother and child and father and child. These experience shape the relationships Molly has in the future. All the events and experiences we live through effect our decisions through life. Molly has never dealt with her past and now she must if she is going to be able to go forward with adopting a child with Aidan. The future of their marriage is what finally pushes her to go back and face her past. Diane Chamberlain is a master in the family relationship story and crafts fine characters that are flawed, but human. Her novels are peppered with "alive" people and that is a gift every writer tries to find. Enjoy this on the beach or anywhere.
